You know the woman at work who came back from holidays looking so refreshed? She had her eyes done.

The girl at the front desk whose lipstick is always so glossy? Fillers.

The politician you’ve been admiring on the six o’clock news? She got her jawline reshaped. She hasn’t frowned in 15 years. Her earlobes are migrating faster than the transcontinental plates.

It’s everywhere, people. And the only thing more common than plastic enhancement is the number of people who just can’t see what’s right in front of their cute little button noses.

It’s cosmetic blindness.